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Friday, July 18, 2014

Graduate Student Power Tripping After First Nature Publication

La Jolla, CA

After receiving word earlier this morning that the draft of his manuscript submitted to Nature Chemistry was "accepted with minor revisions," Scripps Research Institute graduate student Caleb Miller has reportedly lapsed into a state of megalomaniacal power tripping.  "I got... accepted... in Nature..." sources report Miller stating, initially with slight trepidation and disbelief.  "I got into Nature," he repeated emphatically.

Since initially learning of the success of his latest publication, Miller's over inflated sense of self worth and rapidly ballooning ego have made working with him nearly impossible.  "He's become insufferable," stated Sarah Ferguson, a first year graduate student.  "I get that being published in Nature is a big deal, but Christ, maybe he could turn it down from eleven?"

"He actually -- and I shit you not -- demanded that we all refer to him as 'your highness.'  Who does that?"  Ferguson added.

Reports indicate that Miller then attempted to start a chant of his own name in the lab.  "MILLER!  MILLER!  MILLER!" he chanted while loudly and rhythmically clapping his hands, eventually trailing off as lab members looked on with incredulity.  "What does he think this is, a football game? added Steven Jackson, PhD., one of the lab's post-docs.  "I'm first author on two Nature papers and one in Science," he added with slight indignation.

As of press time, Miller had constructed a crown from Parafilm, borosilicate transfer pipettes, and a large crystallization dish, and had re-purposed a large column for use as a scepter.

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